GlocalNet

I was reading Amy Colon’s blog for church planters wives on our site, “They have all the Fun!”, and thought it was really good.  It made me want to talk to you guys about being good husbands and fathers.  This is the most important thing you’re going to model to your church.  You can do it.  It’s a qualification for ministry, as a matter of fact.  Paul writes, if you can’t lead your family, why do you think you can lead the church? 

I don’t think there is anything more difficult to do in ministry than to start a church, if you do it right!  Anyone can do some brochures and have a gathering or a Sunday event, or whenever the time is, but to see it be the church, that’s another thing.  With our emphasis on engagement in glocalnet, both local and global, it can take even more time, and the result is a lot more exciting as well.  It takes time, energy, creativity, the ability to hear God and recognize moments.  In short, it takes every minute of every waking hour.  The first two years are particularly difficult, you don’t have enough money, people, or time to get it all done, but the highest level of risk is also present.

Having said all of that, I still believe there is enough time to be a great Dad and husband, as you plant a church.  So how do you do it?

1.  Praise your wife daily.  Find something unique or special that she’s done and brag on her.  You build her up or tear her down.  You may say you never say anything negative, but if you never say anything positive, it’s like ignoring her and who she is.

2.  Encourage her to have interests outside of the ministry.  Those wives who have identities outside of their husbands will be far happier, more productive, and even better leaders than those who have to operate in the shadow of their husband.  That doesn’t mean they aren’t called to it and shouldn’t be involved.  It just means they need a space of their own, and you should encourage it. 

3.  Take your wife out weekly, even if you’re broke.  Buy a $.99 cent cup a joe and sit somewhere and talk.  I can’t tell you all the stupid things I’d do with Nikki when we were starting out and broke, just to be together. 

4.  If you have to be gone late into the evening, knock off at 3 or 4pm, go home and play with the kids and the wife.  There’s no getting around the long hours, but there are many ways to organize those hours so you can get it all done. 

5.  After you’ve established your presence in a country overseas, get your wife there as quickly as possible.  If you both can’t afford to go, send her on a trip to that spot really soon.  She needs to be a part of it.  Let her do some of the “fun” stuff.  It’s no big deal now for Nikki to travel all over the world without me!  Make sure she gets to do some of the fun inner-city stuff as well.  You don’t want her being stuck in a spot she hates, because no one else will do it.  She’ll smile to everyone else, but spit on you! 

6.  Help around the house.  You should be a part of picking up, watching the kids, etc.  You may not be able to do as much as she does, but you need to make sure she knows you’re helping and are a part of it.

7.  Give her some money to take out some wicked, sinful, evil woman to have coffee or lunch with in hopes of bringing her to Christ, and you do lunch with the kids! 

What would you add? . . . .